I got GOALS

1. Work out atleast once a week

This past summer I wrote a goal list (4 different goals... 2.5 which I've followed through with), and running twice a week was on there. I ran for a good two months every Tuesday and Thursday morning before work with friends at 5:00 am but then I realized I don't function waking up that early so I quit. I want to start becoming active in order to look and feel my best. Specifically, I want to get rid of my untoned stumach and jiggly butt and thighs.

2. Use reusable grocery bags - shop smart

Part of me wanting to become a more sustainable individual

3. More trips to the farmers market

Supporting local farmers and knowing where my foods are coming from

4. Shop local - check out downtown Opelika

Better than Tiger Town, Supporting local busines

5. Say "I love you" to people I love

Because this should not be hard

6. Bring back "Meatless Monday" lunches/ dinners

To build back distanced friendships and promote sustainable behaviors that are fun

7. Drink more water, green tea

Because health

8. Build, rekindle, or invest in relationships

Because I can't do everything on my own and it's nice to have people by your side

9. Spend wisely, save aggressively

Because Vegas, Copenhagen, and TWENTY-FUN is happening all in one summer. And also rent is going up next year.

10. Make health appointments

Sustainability isn't just about the planet but the health of the individual as well

11. Open your heart - to acquantances, love interests, and friends

Because being gaurded and tense is no way to go through life

12. Personal hygiene

Because society, ugh

13. Get enough sleep

Because I hate the feeling of being tired, love being up early, hate under-eye bags, love getting up before alarm 

Nothing's Fair

Nothing’s fair

and I have a hard time believing that thing’s happen for a reason.

Especially when bad things happen.

ESPECIALLY, when bad things happen to good people.

Good people with strong faith

and good people with big hearts.

They didn’t need anything to happen to them

and they didn’t need a reason.

Things were fine.

Now, things aren’t

and it’s not fair.

Why I'm Mad (And subsequently joining a nunnery)

Here’s the issue, you guys. And I know I’ve been talking about this situation for the past four months, at least, to some of my girlfriends, but this is something that is just on my mind constantly and I don’t know why or know how to get over it yet.

Long story short I had been “talking” to this guy and we had gone on several dates, or what I like to call them “business meetings.” The first date was right before Valentine’s Day and he had gotten me a xoxo heart holding Teddy bear. This guy has a kid and is 5 years older than me. All signs point to him wanting a serious relationship. He wasn’t pushy or assertive, but he definitely wasn’t looking to be just friends. I, on the other hand, was a nervous wreck. I wanted to take things slow – real slow.

(Let me send sweet apologies because this is actually not going to be a short story)

Everything was going well, I’m a super busy girl so we weren’t spending every minute, day, or week together so that was delightful for me. The few dates we went on were nice and he would occasionally come by my house on his way home from class. These moments were great. I guess you can say (because he did and I almost panicked) we were dating. But then, when I wasn’t around him, I was constantly thinking about him. I thought about kissing him, cuddling on the couch watching movies with him, and even moving to the west coast and marrying him (HAHA…ok). I also thought about everything else that build relationships; We were two different people, we had two different lifestyles, and we were in two different places in our lives.

Was I thinking too much into this budding relationship? Should I have let it flow?

I don’t have a certain answer! On one hand I liked the guys – he was sweet and really wanted to know me. On the other hand – his constant “turning up” and immature behavior were major turn offs.

The relationship began to fizzle the day after we finally made out (approximately 6 months after it began and two weeks before he wanted to make it official – on his birthday, btw; he wanted to make it official on his birthday.) It was in the parking lot of The Exchange right after I got off of my library job.  He asked me to meet him at the basketball courts where he was with his friends and I finally said yes (after saying no numerous time because EW WHY). It was there where I realized, though a nice guy, all he talked about was drinking (which he previously said he was giving up and lasted for about 3 weeks so you're super lame for not following through) and how happy he was for his son to be at grandma's in Montgomery, and using all this profanity. I was over it but something kept me smiling. He was persistently trying to kiss me and I kept denying him until it was time to go. I’m not going to lie I liked the neck kisses and wasn’t embarrassed, after a while, that we were in a parking lot.

After saying “goodnight” assertively like  I was in some teenage Rom Com, I got in my car and almost cried. This was not what I wanted and I immediately asked my Date Doctor, Megan, how I break up with him.

The next day I lost my phone and was sure he would think I didn’t like what happened there that night (the truth). I saw him two days later at work and told him I had lost my phone. We were together for three hours in the fitting room and it was nice. I WAS SO CONFUSED ON MY FEELINGS FOR THIS GUY.

A little over a week later I got my phone and texted him and let him know. In response he said “Kool lol” AND THAT WAS IT. WHAT. (Let me just say that you’re damn near 25 stop using K instead of C for words)

After that, no “good morning beautiful texts” or nothing.

The flame fizzled.

I did attempt to text him another time about his birthday and it was super dry. I didn’t respond to his last text (though I did get two group texts from him inviting me to his birthday party this upcoming Saturday - which I'm not going to attend because I'm a special type of lady and will only go if I get a personal invite).

NOW WHAT?

I can’t stop thinking about this situation. Not so much him. I do miss texting him but I don’t miss any romantic aspect this relationship could have developed into.

WHAT AM I FEELING?

So yeah, I’m mad.

Hi

Hi I wanna come back because recent events have inspired me.

But do people use blogger/ blogspot anymore?

Should i just put my bidness on tumblr like the rest of you hipsters?

taken a chill pill from this

@lexxh

Learning from Lack

"Been thinking a lot about seasons, and not just because we’re in the midst of my favorite one. I’ve been thinking about the ebb and the flow, the yin and the yang of sowing good seeds and harvesting the blessings of life. For the purpose of this blog, I’m speaking of blessings of the spirit.

I have a friend who’s going thru a bit of a rough patch. A job she depended on ended and as a result, some of the things (of the material variety) she feels she needs are now in jeopardy. As she shared her story, I was reminded of the principles of the seasons and what they teach us.

For anything to grow, be it an oak tree or your character, there are seasons we must endure and hopefully respect. Perennial flowers, which bloom year after year, come to mind. They are planted in spring, enjoyed for a few weeks in the summer, then cycle down to endure the chill of fall and cold of winter. Then when spring arrives, they bloom again. The blooming time gets all the attention, but there’s a lot of good going on within those flowers when winter has, for a time, hidden their blooms. To see their beauty yet not appreciate the cold dark season that nurtured them and gave them what they needed to thrive, is to miss the most important part of the growth process. It’s ironic that the time they’re the most appreciated for their beauty is the time when they’re the closest to giving up their leaves and blooms in order to prepare for the process anew.

Your dreams and plans are like that flower. And the seasons of life affect them in the same way. Sometimes it’s your “summer” and everything is beautiful and you’re flourishing. All is truly well. So well, that the chill to come may can catch you off guard and make you dread the stillness that’s comes in winter. But there’s care and nurturing in the seasons when you’re not figuratively in bloom. Winter is when WE grow, too.

My best lessons about provision and calling have come in my “seasons of lack,” those times when I lost what I felt I needed. God is awesome in that way. By losing what you feel you need to survive yet…surviving, you are reminded of how strong you really are and how little the perceived “necessities” in life really matter. Seasons of lack teach us that.

So the next time it’s cold and dark and all seems lost, take inventory of all that still remains. I promise it is more than you imagined and more than enough to keep you until your springtime comes.

With love,

Yvette Nicole Brown

As always, please share what you’re learning…it helps us all grow! You can

reach me on twitter at: @yvettenbrown

Simply Believe…"

you dont know me